Archive for June, 2011

Wishes, Dishes and Unfinished Dreams…

The problem with me and blogging is that I never seem to have ideas when I finally find time to sit still long enough to blog. I much prefer my journal in the mornings. Morning pages are the brain child of whomever wrote “The Artist’s Way” – I can’t remember their name at the moment and I’m too lazy to get up and search for the book to find out. Actually, the truth is that the minute I rise from this chair I will find something to distract me from this blog and this will be the last you’ll hear from me. What I like about journaling is that it is spontaneous and no one is ever going to read it so it doesn’t have to be polished.

Morning pages are basically a mental bran muffin, the blank page your toilet. It’s a crude analogy but true. Morning pages become the place where you dump all the stuff that’s cluttering your mind. Whatever problems you’ve woken up with banging around in your head, the morning page is a releasing place. Now, that being said about journaling and morning pages I have to admit that I regret not being able to write with such freedom on this blog. I have a pretty strict censor who likes to talk me out of writing much of anything. But as I look back over this last year and what I had hoped to accomplish with this blog I’m regretting having given into that little critic so often. My wish is that I could have written at least once a week about the crazy life that is going back to one’s hometown and living on a farm so close to one’s parents. Believe me, there have been few dull moments and some pretty amazing revelations. Perhaps there is an opportunity to capture some of those moments in illustration and post them in the future.

As for the present, I just finished yet another home improvement project with my dad. Talk about a way to celebrate father’s day – spend a week installing a dishwasher with your dad (full story to follow)! I’m happy to say that we did not destroy the kitchen, except for the spot where the dishwasher would sit, and I am now dishpan-hands free! Truly, dishwashers are marvelous inventions.

With an extra hour free in my mornings thanks to the newfangled contraption that cleans my dishes for me I really have no excuse to leave this blog blank so often. And what better time to start blogging again as the promise of another adventure presents itself.

Lately, I’ve been practicing the art of slowing down. It is my attempt to let things unfold in their own time and to give up my habit of worrying about the future. Sure, there are still things I need to think about but really, if you could step into my brain and see that little hamster running pell-mell on that wheel, smoke spiraling up from his burning feet, you’d understand that my thinking is a frantic scurrying from one problem to the next. It’s not the most productive form of problem solving and it’s time I gave my brain a break and a chance to simply let things be. In doing this I’ve discovered a sense of peace. I’ve also discovered things tend to happen with much less effort. I gave up worrying about where I was going to find myself in this next year – I know that my time in Port Angeles is coming to a close – and today an amazing opportunity presented itself. No help from me. No need to go out and force a plan of action into play. It was simply there. Whether you call it fate, karma or God providing (I tend to go with the latter of these), life, when we allow it, unfolds in beautiful and hopeful ways. I’ve discovered though the one hitch to this, you must provide space for these opportunities to occur. You can’t just sit on your couch eating rice cakes and a pint of Haagen Dazs, saying “things will happen if I’m patient.” You do have to put a little effort in. You have to take that first step. Get the ball rolling. Choose your analogy. What I have to remind myself is that once effort is put out there I can’t expect it to be exactly as I wanted. Maybe I wanted to travel so I opened up some free time and I started planning a trip to Italy. Only I discovered the plane tickets were too pricey. Instead I get a call from a friend wanting to go to the Grand Canyon. Bam! Suddenly a trip is in the making. It’s not exactly what I had in mind but I was open to the possibility of an adventure where ever it might take me.

So this next year will find me in a new city. I don’t want to say too much just yet as things are still falling into place. But whatever happens I’m looking forward to continuing this blog and seeing it grow into something more.


Read Full Post »

…hopefully with a little less snarling and growling, but I can’t guarantee it.

Read Full Post »